Sunday, August 12, 2012

Maid-of-honor speech, #tanko2012


My friend Sheree got married last Sunday and I was her Maid-of-Honor. I was supposed to give a speech for the couple during the reception but I didn't do it because I have stage fright (haha!). So para makabawi bawi man lang, here's my Maid-of-Honor speech:

Congratulations to the couple!

Sheree and I go a long way back. We've been friends for 12 years. And in those 12 years, I can say that we grew up together in a lot of aspects.

My friendship with Sheree is not all rainbows and butterflies. We met at a time when we were still governed by immaturity and childishness. And so because of it, there were times when we fought and ignored each other. But not very long, for we have always found ourselves going back to the comforts of our friendship. I can't explain it, there is like an invisible magnet that draws us together. Those incidents led us to know each other better, what makes us happy and what makes us tick. Those incidents strengthened a lasting friendship that, unknown to both of us then, would save, comfort and protect us from all of life's insanities.

Come to think of it, we've been there for each other in each and every major thing that's happened in our lives so far since we've met. Losing boyfriends, graduating, getting a job, family issues, personal issues, career issues... Our friendship is a constant thing we both have and I guess it is mostly attributable to the fact that we are confident with our place in each other's lives. We let each other be. We encourage each other to explore and create friendships with other people, never getting jealous or fearful that others might steal one of us away because for us, there is no one that can equal what we are to each other. And we know that wherever life takes us, no matter the distance in between, our friendship is one that can stand the test of time.

Anyhow, I am in no position to advise the couple about married life because I myself am not yet married. But  through my limited experience and with the help of my own life mentors, I've picked up a thing or two to share with you and Miguel. These are some of the things you already know, but have to be reminded of once in a while.

Make God the center of your relationship. In this ever-changing world, we can only count on God to keep our relationships intact. All else may fail, but everything that is anchored to God will be a success. THAT is a tried and tested truth.

Always give thanks and appreciation to one another. In time, you will find yourselves over-familiar with one other. Everyday, take time to be still, talk, and thank each other for the little things. Appreciate his cooking. Appreciate her keeping house. Appreciate that he opened the car door for you. Appreciate her gentleness. These "little things", when piled up, are what really make up the big things. Appreciation is the fuel to run this incredibly great car called love.

Be each other's support system. You are two people that became one in Christ. Today, in front of God, your family and friends, you are now one. Help each other to be the best person that he/she can be. Do not one-up each other or be competitive. Be happy for each other's achievements. Pride has no place in your relationship as you are now permanently and irrevocably ONE.

Learn to compromise. One of the best things that marriage can give a person is a permanent life partner. From now on forward, you are partners in everything. There will come a time that you will not agree on something. You will find yourselves in two opposite poles of the stick. When you do, learn to give way. If not, find a neutral ground. Do not be black or white. Be gray.

And lastly, know when to be strict and when to let loose. Love cannot live without trust. Do not hold on too tight that your partner would suffocate and not to loose that your partner would not feel valued. Hold on to each other with the right amount of force. Encourage each other to explore, while keeping each other grounded.

So that's it! I hope you guys learned something from me tonight. Again, congratulations and I wish you the best and a fruitful life ahead. Cheers!

*Babsky and Chokoy. That's our term of endearment with each other. I am Babsky (cute term for baboy) and Sheree is Chokoy (cute term for batchoy).

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